The Value of Family

Loretta Girzartis said, "The world is full of lonely people, each isolated in a private, secret dungeon."1What a dismal image. And what a divergence from the beautiful words and pictures in Scripture, of mother and father with their children. To be placed into the arms of a caring mother and father minutes after birth; to be surrounded by warmth and love from siblings and grandparents, aunts and uncles; to have your needs met, your mind informed and your desires controlled and restrained; to know that there are people who love you and will love you all your life, and are united together in seeking your best This is no dungeon. This is the value of family as designed by the Creator.

The family is the comfort zone for little children. Frightened children, alarmed by some perception of danger in the yard or neighborhood, do not run to the dog or the television; they run home to find their mother or father. After an upsetting day at school there is almost immediate relief when the distressed child crosses the threshold into their home, their comfort zone. There is tremendous practical value in having a stable home, with parents who are united in their love for each other and their devotion to their children. I had that, did not fully appreciate it as a child, but shudder to imagine how I would have blundered and stumbled around without two godly parents! Fathers not only exhort and charge, they comfort (1 Thess. 2:11; Psa. 103:13). Mothers are known for their natural affection and skill in cherishing their offspring (Jno. 19:27; Rom. 1:31; 2 Tim. 3:3; Titus 2:4; 1 Thess. 2:7; 1 Sam. 1:11). In homes where God's order is the rule, children are protected, nourished and strengthened by this comfort zone.

The family is God's institution for moral instruction. "Abraham command[ed] his children and his household, to keep [God's] ways ... to do righteousness and justice..."(Gen. 18:19). Abraham didn't say, "I'm going to serve God; the rest of you do whatever you want!"He taught his family the ways of the Lord, and commanded his children in righteousness and justice. Children need this and God designed the family to provide it. In the home parents are charged to "...bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord"(Eph. 6:4). Please consider this: even when children are given right instruction and enjoy godly role models, there is no guarantee they will always be righteous. So what is likely to happen in the absence of this training?

The family is a place where priorities are illustrated. I own a rifle, enjoy hunting and have involved my boys in this interest. Someday (I am willing to wait a few years) I hope to take my grandson hunting (if my daughter and son-in-law grant their permission). But I do not believe this activity is vital or essential, and I am persuaded that a young man can grow into adulthood and be a conscientious Christian without ever pulling a trigger. Further, I am convinced of this: long before boys are introduced to rifles they need to be introduced to the Lord and His will. Some fathers rush their boys into weaponry, hunting and other manly pursuits before their boys have become acquainted with the Man of Galilee. There is a carnal mentality (not limited to the south) that you cannot be a robust and complete male if you haven't learned to shoot and kill. (I have heard of fathers who have such an exaggerated or warped devotion to these things, they ritualistically dip their sons hands in the blood of their first kill!). This kind of thinking and behavior enjoys no support from God's Word, and could lead to all manner of reckless and destructive behavior, even death. Long before we give our boys rifles, trucks and fishing gear, let us give them a Bible and show them what it means through the influence of our lives. Let us put character training before rifle training. "Chasten your son while there is hope, and do not set your heart on his destruction," (Prov. 19:18).

If you believe what has been taught in this article (and the others in this issue), pray for strength to be a better member of your family. Explore various ways you can contribute to the spiritual stability and happiness of your family. Get mad at the devil for his ugly assault against marriages and homes, and channel that indignation into zealous study, action and application. And do this: sit down with the members of your family and read 1 Cor. 13:4-7. That passages gives us the tools to build better marriages and families. We can all do better. "God, give us Christian homes! Homes where the Bible is loved and taught, homes where the Master's will is sought, homes crowned with beauty Thy love hath wrought; God, gives us Christian homes; God, give us Christian homes! Amen."2

1Words For All Occasions, Glenn Van Ekeren, page #297.

2"God Give Us Christian Homes," B.B. McKenney, #472, Hymns for Worship, 1994.