Can mothers with small children take the Supper?
by Ed Whittlesey
“Anything ranging from a dirty diaper, to a child not wanting to sit still or sit quietly, can serve as distractions for mothers of young children during the Lord’s Supper,” one mother exclaimed. Another commented, “My worst fear (and has come close to happening) is that theyll grab one of the trays and dump it on the floor. They see us eating and drinking and don’t understand why they can’t with us … ” While young mothers are required to share in communion of the body and blood of the Lord, they must also tend to the needs of their children. The challenge is one of multitasking, as young mothers struggle to find balance between the two. “It is very hard to concentrate on the Lord’s Supper while watching your kids, especially in the cry room,” remarked one mother. “Some people use the cry room as a play room and it’s hard to focus when kids are crying or playing and being loud.” Another suggested, “everyone needs to be understanding of the fact that children are being trained in how to worship God correctly and that isn’t always going to be as quiet an activity as we parents wish it were.” Let’s be honest, no mother wants undue attention drawn to her or her children during solemn observance of the Lord’s Supper. That said, how are frustrations like these overcome?
Mothers can partake in a worthy manner (1 Cor. 11:27), examine self (1 Cor. 11:28), and also care for a needy child. In fact, some experienced Christian mothers weighed in on how they handled the distractions. Some remarked that they offered a short prayer after partaking of each emblem. One mother used the “quiet finger” and did not respond to her children until after the Lord’s Supper. Another mother practiced taking care of the immediate problem; changing the child’s position, or tapping her hand lightly on the child’s mouth. Others commented they did not allow their children to stand, walk, or turn around in the pew. One spoke of the importance of discipline and the need to establish it early on. Another mother added, “The Lord knows your heart, and how it can be taking care of small children. You can let the Lord know how you feel and still deal with your children when necessary.”
Some might now be asking how to incorporate these perspectives into their worship. Just what does it take to endure trying moments like these and still feel good about our worship to the Lord? After thoughtful consideration, several mothers have provided some practical tips to help this part of our worship be better.
Prepare. Care for the young one’s needs (feedings, diaper changes, etc.) prior to the worship service to minimize interruptions and distractions. Save a special book, a quiet snack, or activity for the Lord’s Supper. Plan ahead of time around who will take baby out and care for the other children. Obviously, involvement from fathers is most helpful, so another factor is whether Dad is serving in the worship activities. An additional piece of advice is to carefully choose seating. Try to avoid sitting where windows or people can distract or set a bad example for your child. Depending on age, frequently stress the importance and purpose of the Lord’s Supper so kids understand the behavior expected of them.
Focus. Read or memorize a scripture from the Bible to maintain focus. Consider tabbing favorite scriptures in case little hands close your Bible. Type and laminate favorite scriptures so they can be easily accessed and read. Spend time in prayer or reflect on the words of a relevant hymn. Help children focus on and join in the worship activities they can participate in (singing, praying, etc.) In addition, think of the concentration and focus Christ exhibited as He prayed in the garden, despite the distractions of the moment. We too, can focus our minds for a short time with some effort. After all, Christ went through much more for our sake.
Take action. Be cognizant of the fact that our child’s actions could be a distraction to others. If exiting the worship service becomes necessary, attend to the child’s immediate need (including discipline), and return to the assembly to worship God. More specifically, prevent reoccurrences of poor behavior by not allowing the child to have “more fun” in the cry room/nursery. We parents must be responsible for correcting our child’s actions and reinforcing in their minds were there to worship God. Most children will grasp this concept at an early age, provided their parents consistently enforce it. Furthermore, seize opportunity to compliment good behavior. It will help to ground appropriate conduct in our children for worship.
By partaking of the Lord’s Supper we proclaim, even to children, our faith that Jesus died for our sins and that He is coming again. As parents, we are accountable for instructing and guiding our children in the ways of the Lord (Prov. 22:6; Eph. 6:4), and The Supper serves as invaluable training for our children. In the midst of all the challenges and distractions, young mothers play an honorable and integral role in setting the primary example their child will follow for worshipping God. Fathers, other family members, and fellow Christians would do well to support and encourage young mothers throughout this important stage of life.